Monday, December 7, 2009
Thanksgiving has come and gone. You couldn't join us this year. You said it was "too hard". We missed you. I know this is all so hard for you. It breaks my heart. You can't walk anymore. Your legs are too weak to hold you up. But your brain doesn't remember that, so you keep trying. And keep falling.
The kids were here all weekend. I'm so glad they all came to see you. Ella's eyes light up when she sees you. You got to see Jackie's pregnant belly....and looked at Amy's sparkly engagement ring again. I know it was all overwhelming for you, but I'm happy we were all there with you. I will remember it for a long time.
You have no short-term memory now. Only very long-term. And only sometimes. I am so thankful you still know who I am. And I believe you know Ella and Jackson, too. At least I think you do.
My shows are finally done for the year. I'll have lots more time to visit now. Remember how you used to help me with them, Mom? Remember that cold Ohio Mart that we wore long-underwear and mittens it was so bitter out? Long-ago memories.
Hospice has come in to help now, Mom. I know you don't understand exactly what is happening. I'm not sure I do, either. I just know that they are angels. All of them. They give you lots of extra attention; bought you a new, padded wheelchair, and a new, lower-to-the-ground hospital bed. They brought special padding to put next to it so that when you fall, it's not as hard.
I know you can't understand any of this. It's just not fair.
Just know that you have a family who loves you dearly, Mom. And we are here for you. Always.
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