Life Lessons are sometimes hard. And painful. But life wasn't meant to be easy. I try to be very aware of God's messages to me......but I can be dense when I don't want to hear what He has to say.
In an earlier post, I wrote about God's gentle whispers to me. When those don't work, He nudges me to get my attention. Then come the rocks. "Yeah yeah God. I hear you...but I'm busy with life right now". Then come the boulders! He's done it again: big huge boulders. They tend to be shocking, painful...and always come with a lesson. It's not always easy to see what that is....but it's always there.
This time, His boulder brought me to a total standstill. The lesson wasn't difficult to figure out. He taught me that relationships are hard. They take work, compromise, and forgiveness. He taught me to always forgive, and to step back and view the situation from His perspective. That's difficult.
I've never encountered any situation in life where I didn't forgive. Ever. BUT: you can't always get the other person to accept that forgiveness and take it for what it is, from one heart to the other.
I had decided that after this 'boulder', I would stop helping others. Stop giving back. How foolish I was. I will always be who I am and not change my heart because of a boulder. I will move forward cautiously. Prayer...and the wisdom of friends (some have been in my life since I was little....some a shorter time) have helped be see the lesson to be learned from this "boulder".
I've been close to God since I was a little girl, with a great devotion to The Blessed Virgin. As a 2nd grader I came home from school, announcing to my mother that when I grew up, I was going to become a nun. I LOVED Sister Mary Joselia even more than my dolls....and I REALLY loved my dolls. Well....my mother didn't feel the same way about my decision....and marched me into the principal's office (Sr. Mary Verone) asking where my classroom/desk was, and brown paper grocery sack in hand, she cleaned out my desk. I was enrolled the next day, much to my dismay, in the public school. My mother was right. I would have become a nun and missed the love of the man I adore, 2 wonderful sons, 2 sweet DIL's and 4 precious grandbabies!
Through it all....I kept my love for Mary, praying to her daily, placing my heart in her hands. She has helped me deal with the boulders in my life...including this one. My apology to my dear sweet "old" friend who came in from out-of-town, and over lunch, tearfully asked when seeing all the religious posts and "likes" on my FB page, if I was battling some fatal healthscare. I'm so sorry, Susie......but SO grateful we had that beautiful visit.
Did I mention that with God's Boulders also come blessings from above? This time....the blessing is a new grandson...born to our son and DIL, Tom and Amy. He is beyond beautiful. A true gift from the Lord. Along with our other 3 grandchildren...they put everything in life back into perspective. And this time, the boulder isn't so hurtful, the pain not so great.